


Alone

by TheWildOmega



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Pregnant Reader, cheating crowley
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-03
Updated: 2016-06-02
Packaged: 2018-05-18 02:48:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5895112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWildOmega/pseuds/TheWildOmega
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reader is pregnant with Crowley's child and goes to tell him only to feel m ore alone than ever...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

You were so excited you and Crowley had been together for a while now almost two years and things were great. As you ran down the hallway towards his throne room you couldn't help but smiling, today you had found out that you were pregnant and couldn't wait to tell the king. He had mentioned having children again so you knew he wanted them. You had dressed in his favorite outfit, a black lace sundress he had bought you. Everything was perfect you had done your make up and hair and held the small box that contained a stick with a small pink plus.   
Arriving at the large wooden door you stopped and took a deep breath attempting to hide the large smile on your face, you didn't want to give away the surprise. Once you had brought your glee down a smudge you opened the door. What you saw was not something you were ready for. There was Crowley the man of your dreams with his pants down to his ankles pounding into one of the she-demons that was always trying to get a promotion. She was beautiful and you had always tried to be as nice as possible to her but seeing her laying on her back on the desk with her shirt ripped open and her skirt pushed up around her waist you had never felt more hate in all your life.   
Hearing the door open Crowley looked to yell at the intruder but all blood left his face when he saw y/n. She was just staring at him, her face was pale and he watched as tears welled up in her eyes. Never in his life had he hated himself so much. "Y/n.."  
Swallowing the lump in your throat you looked down at your feet, "I'm sorry... for in...truding." Without another word you stumbled away back down the hall dropping the box to the stone floor. Reaching the portal you went through it leaving Hell and the father of your child behind.   
Crowley had instantly threw the woman away from him. Pulling his pants back up he held them as he fumbled out into the hallway after you. Just as he looked down the dark hall he saw your back fade through the portal to earth. "NO... y/n..." Hearing the woman come up behind him he snapped his fingers making her nothing but a cloud of smoke. Fixing his pants he looked down to see a small rectangular box. It was wrapped in red paper with a black bow on top. Opening the box he moved the tissue paper to the side and what he saw made him fall to his knees. There in the box was a white stick with a small pink plus on the center bar. Y/n, she was pregnant. She was coming to tell him they were going to have a baby... that he was going to be a father.   
His hands began to shake and he felt the veins in his forehead and neck bulge as he was filled with a great rage. His face flushed red matching his eyes as his hands balled up into fists, his nails cutting into his palm drawing blood.  
After leaving Crowley you had went back to your small apartment. Looking around you felt nothing but pain. You knew you couldn't stay here there were so many memories of the two of you. Packing a bag of only things you really needed you grabbed your car keys and went down to the parking lot. Getting in your car you thought, you had friends Sam and Dean Winchester they might let you stay with them for a while. You had hunted with them before and were very close with Bobby but when you started seeing Crowley you all had gotten in a fight and had not left on good terms. Moving your hand you rubbed your palm over your belly were your child was growing, "It's okay... we are going to be alright." You said with a sob filled voice and started the car. Driving away you couldn't help the tears from falling down your face.


	2. Chapter 2

Pulling up to the side of a empty road you looked around. Kansans was beautiful place especially in fall like now. Taking a deep breath you looked in the mirror attempting to fix your makeup as much as possible. Getting out of the car you grabbed your bag and made your way to the bunker door. Knocking you waited and looked up to see Dean open the door and look at you.   
Dean, Sam and Cas all sat quietly while you told them what had happened. "Well I hate to tell you I told you so y/n but..." Dean said making your eyes shoot down and try to hide your tears. When all of the men saw your emotion they looked baffled and Sam slapped Dean's arm. "Hey y/n it's okay you don't need him just forget him." Sam told you trying to make you feel better. Feeling more tears cloud your eyes you fittled your fingers, "I..I can't just forget him.." you started making Dean chuckle and nudge your knee. "Sure ya can y/n go out find you a new date .... you'll be over him in a week." Shaking your head you looked at him, "I'm pregnant Dean..."   
Crowley chugged down another glass of whiskey as he looked around your apartment. He had gotten you it when you both had stated seeing each other, it was nice sized and had a beautiful view, but the view wasn't so beautiful now. He had turned the place upside down looking for any clue where you would be. He found your cell phone on the bed along with the necklace he had given you. He was hoping you would have kept it on, it had a tracking trinket in it and he would have known where you were instantly. Dropping down to sit on the couch he buried his face in his hands, he had really fucked up this time, a time when it meant so much.   
It had now been five months since your world had fallen apart. The boys had let you move in with them for the time being and had been very supportive of your decision to keep the baby. Crowley had called the boys non-stop asking for information on you but they always played it off that they didn't know where you were. You couldn't get him out of your head no matter how much you tried... you loved him. It was funny you had always said no matter what if a man cheated on you then that was it but it took all you had not to call him. Flushing the toilet you leaned back against the tub and whipped your mouth with a rag. You couldn't keep anything down, everything made you sick and the fact that there was nothing in your belly just made it worse. Dean and Sam had left to go on a case three days ago and for three days you had spent much of your time right here. Deciding to get some fresh air you went to the garage and started up your car.   
Arriving at the store you got out and looked around for any snack that caught your eye. Taking your time you looked sideways at a man who was creeping you out. He was looking between the man at the register and the cameras. Moving your hand to your belly you went to move to the counter with your bag of skittles when the man grabbed your arm and pressed a knife to your throat. "Give me all your money or the bitch dies!" The man yelled to the one behind the counter making him look at you. Without thinking he started to fill a bag with money before handing it to the other man with shaking hands.   
Grabbing the money he threw y/n to the ground hard making her yelp in pain. As soon as the man was out of the store the store owner was by y/n. Her eyes fluttered as she slowly lost consciousness.   
Sitting at his throne Crowley listened as one of the petty demons begged for his life. He was barely paying attention so when his phone rang he was quick to answer without looking at the number. "Hell hotline?" Listening Dean told him something to make even the king of hell break down. In an instant he was in the hospital beside the boys. They told him how hey had gotten a call from one of the doctors and they explained what had happened at the convenience store. Crowley wanted to yell he wanted to throw a fit but he couldn't he couldn't because all he could think about was y/n.   
Walking down the hall he stopped and looked in the room she was in. He had never seen her so broken, there she layed on the bed an IV in her arm wearing one of the hospital robes. She was curled up into a ball and she was crying silently. Her eyes weren't focused on her stomach that she was rubbing silently. Walking in he shut the door to give them privacy and walked over to the bed. She didn't even glance up when he sat on the bed beside her. "Y/n dove?" still not meeting his eyes he put his fingers under her chin and raised her eyes to meet his own. They were red and puffy from crying and held so much pain. "I..lost it... I lost our baby..." She sobbed making the demon king wrap her in his arms and hold her as she sobbed.  
"Shh it's okay y/n... it's okay.." Crowley told her feeling a tear come to his own eye. He held her close as he slowly cooed her to sleep. When he was sure she was in a peaceful sleep he slid out of the bed and went to talk to the brothers. "I am taking her back with me..." Crowley told them making Dean shake his head, "No no way you had your chance and you broke her heart..." Feeling his eyes glow red he stood up to the oldest brother, "And who is going to stop me... you? If she had been with me my child wouldn't have died!" Without waiting for a response he made his way over to talk to the doctor. She told him that y/n wouldn't be able to leave until tomorrow morning to make sure she wouldn't bleed out. She told him that if he wanted he could stay the night. Nodding his head he made his way back into the room to be with the woman he loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay I know this is sad but please understand I am pregnant, this is my biggest fear. I wanted to write down my fears and write how I would expect my husband to act.


	3. Chapter 3

Transporting them back to hell the next morning crowley watched as y/n slowly made her way over to the bed. Climbing up in it she borrowed herself into the covers and pillows. She didn't make a sound. Didn't even register him. Silently she cried and held her hand over her belly where their child had been only days ago. 

Crowley looked down at his feet. This was his fault. If he would have never lost his self control that day this wouldn't have happened. He and y/n would have no doubt been still anxiously awaiting the arrival of their child. Now they would have to bury their child. Crowley had sent a funeral home to collect the body and have it cremated. Now he needed to know where they would bury the remains. 

Walking over to the bed he sat down on the edge. Slowly he stroked the side of her face. She refused to look at him but didn't move away from his touch. "y/n?...darling?.. I...we need to decide where it will be buried." "...she.." y/n mumbled and Crowley knotted his brows, "what luv?" with a trembling lip y/n mumbled out "she... Where she will be buried. We were going to have a girl..." hearing this crowley felt his eyes flutter closed and a tear roll down his cheek. He had a daughter. 

Y/n had allowed crowley to have their daughter buried beside him in Scotland. She couldn't bring herself to watch them put the small stone box in the ground. She now stared at the white marble headstone. surprisingly crowley had gotten an angel carved into the stone with the word infant. He stood beside her quietly. Bending down y/n watched as he placed a bouquet of white roses on the grave. "why white?" y/n asked in a shaky voice. Standing he looked down at her sadly. "the white rose is a symbol of purity and innocence.... Like her." 

Y/n felt more tears come to her eyes at his words. Slowly she moved to hold his hand and leaned into his side. "I'm sorry. "they both said at the same time. Y/n looked up at Crowley and he cupped her face in his hands. "you have nothing to be sorry for. This is my fault. Our daughter's death is on me..." "no. Crowley it isn't. This is his fault... " crowley pulled y/n into his chest, wrapping his arms around her. Hugging him she felt a hatred. "find him crowley. Find the man that did this. Kill him." 

Crowley held you tight and kissed the top of your head. "I promise my luv."


	4. Chapter 4

Crowley stood silently in the corner of their chambers, watching her. She was sleeping but it wasn't peacefully. She was crying out, her legs tangling in the covers. She had been like this for a month. Ever since he brought her back to hell with him. They had not shared a bed. Crowley didn't want to overwhelm her and had instead slept on the couch in the room. Every night when she thought he was asleep she would cry and pray to God. Asking him why he took their baby.

Walking over to the bed crowley sat the bag of food on the bed. Sitting on the edge of the bed he stroked the side of her face. All he wanted was for her to be happy. To take away her pain. Snapping out of his thoughts he put on a small smile. "y/n luv, it's time to wake up... I got Chinese for supper... Your favorite."

Crowley watched as her eyes fluttered open. Normally he loved looking into her bright e/c eyes, but now they looked dead, defeated. Still she gave him a small grin and sat up in front of him on the bed, hugging a pillow to her chest.

Kicking off his shoes and shrugging of his coat and tie crowley moved to sit beside her on the bed. Handing her the tray with her food in it before grabbing his own. The two ate in silence. It wasn't an awkward silence but it wasn't a happy one either.

Looking down at his food he sighed. He remembered the time when they were doing this very same thing. Except that time they were laughing. He was trying to teach her how to use chop sticks, letting out a roaring laugh when she got frustrated and just stabbed the piece of chicken before poping it in her mouth.

"...Crowley?... " he was snapped out of his thoughts by her soft voice calling his name. "yes darling?" he replied looking at her. "do you... I mean if your not busy...do you think we could go ...see her?" she was looking down at her food that she had barley touched and he knotted his brows. "I tell you what dove, you eat at least half of that, then we will go. Deal?" looking up she gave him a small smile and nodded.

Looking down at the small grave you felt as a tear rolled down your cheek. You watched as Crowley layed a bouquet of white roses on the grave. Squeezing his hand the two of you stayed there in silence.

It was winter in Scotland and a thick blanket of snow covered the ground. Crowley felt as she shivered slightly and looked down at her. She had small tears rolling down her red cheeks matching her nose. Shrugging of his over coat he placed it on her shoulders. When she looked up at him he gave her a soft smile, moving his hand to cup her cheek, he wiped away the tears with his thumb. "come darling let's go get you warmed up."

Taking her hand in his he led her out of the small graveyard. They walked down the path to the bottom of the hill when he stopped. Looking over at the empty lot he bit his bottom lip. When y/n's looked up at him he nodded towards the land, "that's where my house was...well it wasn't really a house. More of a shack..." he admitted looking out. 

Smiling you looked around, "at least you had a nice view." it really was nice, rolling hills surrounded by a forest and a river. Looking over towards the small town there was an old castle. You thought it was beautiful. You always hated the city, so the large open land was a breath of fresh air to you. 

Crowley watched as she looked over the land. He had not seen her smile like that in a long time. Glancing around him he took in his old home. Maybe it was that he hated his life back then but looking now, she was right it was beautiful. 

Hearing a cough he remembered that he was trying to go warm her up. Squeezing her hand he tugged a little and she followed. Walking into the small village he led her to the pub. 

You were instantly warmed by the heat of the pub. It was very cozy with stone floors and fireplaces. Letting him pull you to an empty booth at the back you sat down and looked around the room then back to him. He was smiling at you. Seeing you try and warm your hands he took them in his and brought them to his mouth, blowing hot air on them. 

When he went to put them back on the table you surprised him by lacing your fingers with his own. The both of you were soon interrupted by a woman coming over to your booth smiling. "Ello' what can I get ya?" you seemed lost at first making crowley give a chuckle. "two hot toddys and a bowl of toffee pudding please." she nodded before walking away. 

The woman returned moments later with two steaming mugs of an Amber liquid and a bowl with what looked to be a cake with a sauce dribbled on top. You have her a soft thank you as she walked away. Looking at Crowley he watched you carefully with a smirk on his face. Lifting the mug to your lips you took a sip of the strange drink. To your surprise it was actually quite good. 

Crowley smiled and gave a chuckle at hearing the hum of enjoyment leave your lips. Spooning of a piece of the cake he lifted it to your mouth. Looking at him with a smile you opened your mouth and let him feed you. It was so good. "that's amazing." you told him making him smile. 

The rest of the night had been spent laughing and talking about this and that. After a while the pub was closing up for the night so Crowley took you both back to his chambers in hell.

When you had came out of the bathroom after your shower you saw that Crowley was already laying down on the couch by the fire. Biting at your bottom lip you walked over to him. He had his eyes closed and was laying on his back with his arm under his head. Deciding to give it a try you layed down on top of him. Snuggling into his side and the back of the couch. 

Crowley jumped at feeling someone on top of him. Moving his head he looked down to see y/n laying on his chest. Her head layed over his heart. Her legs tangled in his own. Looking down at her crowley gave a sigh as he kissed the top of her head, thanking whichever higher power was giving him a second chance. 


	5. Chapter 5

Things had slowly begun to get better for Crowley. Y/n had pulled him to sleep in bed with her every night since their trip to Scotland. They still had not had sex but he was happy just to have her in his arms again. But today he was going to test their relationship. Today was the day they had met 4 years ago and he had something special planned.

Opening the small velvet box in his hand crowley took a shaky breath. He couldn't remember being this nervous in all his long years. Snapping it shut he stood from his throne and went to finish his duties for the day.

You woke up to find a large red box on the end of the bed. Furrowing your brows you crawled down to look at it. Under the bow was a note with your name written in a fancy script. Opening the letter you read.

My dearest y/n,  
Please give me the honor of seeing you in this tonight. I have a surprise for you. I will pick you up at 6.  
Love Crowley.

You couldn't help from smiling at the words. Lifting the lid you looked to see a a stunning f/c silk dress. Gasping you have a smile. Crowley always did have good taste. Looking to the clock you gave a yelp. It was already 4, you only had two hours to get ready. Jumping out of bed you ran to the shower. 

At 6 Crowley popped himself to their chambers. He looked to see y/n sitting on the edge of the bed looking in her lap. "y/n darling,  are you ready?" he asked and saw as she was startled. "forgive me luv I didn't mean to scare you." 

Smiling you stood and walked over to him. He was wearing his usual black suit with a f/c tie, matching your dress. He looked very handsome. 

Crowley looked in awe at her. The dress for her frame beautifully, showing off her curves. It had a slit up to the knee showing a little of her skin but not too much. Her h/c hair was in curls down her shoulders and she wore a small amount of makeup. She was breathtaking. 

"your so beautiful." he said looking into your eyes. His sweet words made a blush cover your cheeks. "thank you, you look very nice too." you told him looking down. 

Giving a small grin crowley gave a bow before holding his hand out for yours. Taking it the two of you disappeared. Looking around you found yourself to be in an empty restaurant. In the middle of the room was a small table with candles lit on it. Waking over he pulled your chair out for you before pushing you in and found to his own seat. 

You couldn't stop smiling as a waiter came and poured you both a glass of wine and handed you your menu.  Looking over the different options you decided on a steak and salad. Crowley had smiled and ordered the same. The two of you talked about this and that until your food came out. The both of you ate in a comfortable silence, smiling up at each other every few minutes. 

Once you were done crowley had ordered you a piece of chocolate cake to share. It was so amazing that you hummed as soon as it hit your mouth making him chuckle. 

After your meal he had paid the bill and offered you his arm. Snapping his fingers you looked around to now find yourself by a beautiful body of water. smiling you walked over to sit on the bench. 

Crowley followed after y/n, sitting beside her on the stone bench. He watched as she looked out over the lake smiling. She was so beautiful. The full moon light hit her skin, making it glow like starlight. 

Deciding this was as good as a time as ever he got down on one knee in front of her. Her eyes snapped to his arms went wide "y/n, I met you 4 years ago today. To be completely honest I never thought we would be where we are now. I know I have hurt you. I have disappointed you. And  I'm so sorry... I know I will never be able to fully make things better between us,  but...  I was hoping you would grant me the chance of working on it everyday for the rest of our lives...but as husband and wife. Will you marry me?" 

You could do nothing but stare at the man in front of you with tear filled eyes. His words even though shaky were so kind and meaningful. Looking down you saw that he was holding out a small velvet box with a stunning gold ring in it. Looking up you nodded your head not trusting your own voice. 

Seeing you nod crowley smiled from ear to ear. Taking the ring out of the box he slid it into your finger before kissing it. Looking back up you threw your arms around his neck and smashed your lips to his. He held your tight as he kissed you back, afraid that if he let go that he would wake from this dream. When you finally did pull back you smiled at him. "I love you Crowley." stroking the side of your cheek he placed his forehead on yours,  "and I love you."

 


End file.
